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Gay Book 'The Locker'
Copyright © 2004 • All Rights
Reserved
The words were out before he knew it, and as he said them he saw Dakota’s head jerk up, his
eyes flash a second of pure anger and then he saw the deep pain, the deep
hurt that came welling up into those wonderful eyes, and Noah felt like crap
in a second, his own fear and anger suddenly gone. He cursed himself as he
realized that Dakota really hadn’t come here to catch him out, to trick
him.
Dakota “Sorry, guess I should go, I didn’t… fuck, what’s the use? I’ll leave, uh,
guess tomorrow is…”
Noah “Wait… please, I didn’t, fuck Dakota I am gay, okay? I am and I am sorry, I just,
it is hard, you don’t know what it is like, hiding all the time, I mean,
shit... Please don’t go I…”
Dakota turned back and looked into Noah’s powder blue eyes. He could see the tears there,
or were those his own he was seeing? He couldn’t explain it, not for a
million bucks but he felt so alone, so empty and yet, maybe, maybe there was
still a chance as he looked at Noah, saw the pain in that oval shaped face.
He could see it, feel it even as he stood there, his own body trembling as
he wondered why life had to be so cruel simply because some were different
than others? Why?
Noah felt the pain deep in his very soul and he regretted his words with each passing second.
Tears were at his eyes and he felt so helpless, so much a fool as he had
caused someone such pain, such unneeded pain and all because he was gay. Why
couldn’t he just get past that, why did he have to see danger around every
corner, feel fear when with someone new, feel panic at each look, each
glance? He felt his body shudder and he reached behind him to grab his
bathrobe. With a shaking hand he picked it up and began to pull it up to put
it on when he heard Dakota’s voice, muted and riddled with a sort of
sorrow that ripped at Noah’s heart as turned to look at Dakota.
Dakota “What are you doing?”
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